A woman’s body goes through a multitude of changes in her entire lifetime. Sizes change, stretch marks come and go, muffin tops become a reality and so do love handles. Having fought the society for a decade and defending my weight loss – gain, I have decided to put this conversation to rest. I am perfect the way I am, I don’t care if you think I have put on a few pounds, it doesn’t matter in the bigger scheme of things because I am happy.
Validation is something we unknowingly live with or live for, sometimes the world around us makes us feel that we need it and sometimes the media lets us believe that being thin or of a certain size is the key to success. As a kid who was chubby I was happily unaware that my size and weight were such big-an-issue for the society in general. As a pre-teen I had the worst few years fending off – defending my body type against barbs and not so thinly veiled comments of how I was a BIG GIRL. Nonetheless the barbs worked and I did things to make myself lose weight, and I still remember the day when I bought my first pair of Levis denim size 24 – it was supposed to be the greatest day of my life; only it wasn’t. I had started looking haggard and unhealthy, I had no energy so to speak of and was falling sick most of the times.
Took me a lot of years to get out of the circle of self-doubt but I did, and funnily discovered that I am happier being the way nature intended me to be. Body image a lot of times isn’t what you think of yourself, but is how the society perceives you. Sometimes your friends, family, spouses project their insecurities on you knowingly – unknowingly and the only way to not get affected is to have a strong belief – in yourself.
So can women be happy at size 16? Of course they can. Dammit, they are! The greater revelation — one that’s a long time coming — is that women can be happy at any size. Even more revolutionary an idea is that women can be miserable at any size too. Because it takes a whole lot of women — happy, sad, skinny and curvy — to constitute half of the human race and no one size has got a lock on
This is more like a note to self and to the other who are like me
“For the long processors, the bedtime criers, the ones who are blinded by the light.
This is for the women who’ve had to learn the hard way that “no” is an act of respect.
This is for the wild feelers, the primal goers, and the ones who dream of another planet that feels more like home.
This is for the girls who are shoved into who they aren’t—and for the wisdom inside their bones from the old soul reincarnated in this now.
For the ones who take any chance to be shoeless, bra-less, and without any worries about what comes next.
The sunshine dwellers, the earth children, the ones who have said yes to forgiveness and being held by the divine first.
This is for the women who not only run with the wolves, but bring their medicine into a society that thinks magic is just a trick.
For the ones who know there is more to life than the 9-to-5 grind and who’ll do anything to bring their art forward and get their message out for others to heal.
For the alchemists, the witches, the medicine mamas—the women who understand and overstep the matrix of fear.
This is for the women who’ve turned their “why me?” into an “it’s me” and became their own guru and source of schooling from beyond.
For the stomachs shaken by the sight of anything impure, the hearts that give too much — a woman is so much more than the society makes her out to be!”
Comment below and share your experiences.